Saturday, October 7, 2017

Abiriga Flopped Out His Willy At Ministry of Finance!

Oh dear, but that chap in yellow – Arua Municipality MP, Ibrahim Abiriga who is almost as comical as Iraqi Information minister, Comical Ali was during the 2nd Iraqi war, is back in the news. A few weeks ago, Abiriga got himself goofed and slapped about in the corridors of parliament by Ayivu County MP, Bernard Atiku. Hmm!
Ibrahim Abiriga, MP
Let’s pause a minute and delve into the lyrics of Coward of The County by Kenny Rogers which, go along these lines:

Everyone considered him the coward of the county, he'd never stood one single time, to prove the county wrong his mama called him Tommy, but folks just called him yellow...

Is there any need to say more on the subject – y’all know what the word ‘yellow’ means in the context of the song and goofing that Abiriga got?

Getting back, less than a week after his hiding, Abiriga decided to go and do the unthinkable – and no, don’t go thinking he went scouring for goons from downtown to go beat up Atiku. After a long day at parliament, he clambered into his yellow Volkswagen Beatle, drove out of the gates of parliament and somewhere along Ministry of Finance on Nile Avenue, he stopped found some shrubbery, unzipped his yellow strides, sprung his thingy out and with no shame did susu. Let me repeat just in case you think it’s a typo error sentence. “...unzipped his yellow strides, sprung his thingy out and with no shame did susu.” And for added measure Police Bodyguard complete with Ak-47 stood behind him and probably encouraged him to shake off the driblets once he was all done.
Caught In The Act
The shame of Abiriga, is that he did not flop thingy out to pee in the dead of the night while the better part of Kampala were tucked up in their beds and fast asleep. He did it the twilight of the afternoon when mothers were picking up their kids from school!

When he was cornered by the media a few days after the incident, with no remorse he admitted that he had and said something along the lines of: “I was caught short. I had to pee. What did you expect me to do, pee in my trousers?”
His Police Bodyguard Standing Guard
Pause up. Is Ministry of Finance not behind Parliament? Could he not have gone to the toilet before he left the house? When he was a kid, did Parent not tell him to go to the toilet before he went on a long trip?

What annoys is that while KCCA Executive Director, Jenny Musisi took action and dragged him to court for being a 'public nuisance' amongst other things, Parliament Speaker, Rebecca Kadaga has kept mum on the incident and allowed him to get away with it. I have always thought there is a code of conduct that governs MPs and doing susu in the streets of Kampala City is just one of those conducts. But did he turn up to answer the charges? Bleak, so I guess that's that then?
How New Vision Online Broke The story
Perhaps we could forgive him - can’t we, because we all don’t come from backgrounds reaped with etiquette and moral values. If Mr. Bukumunhe - dad that is, discovered I had peed on the walls of Ministry of Finance regardless of the time, he would have been mortified. Then disown me.

But I figure the reason why Kadaga has not fined or reprimanded him, is after doing some research on what might have possessed him to unleash in town, I came across a Daily Monitor article and the headline was to the point - ‘In Arua, Latrines Are A Luxury’ - that many homes have to make do with flying kaveera toilets. And Abiriga comes from and wait for it, wait for it...err Arua! I guess his doing susu on walls in the centre of town was no big deal because its an everyday occurrence back home in Arua.
Could This Be the Real Reason Abiriga Peed In The Streets?
Ministry of Finance should erect a commemorative plaque on the wall just above the patch of dead grass that Abiriga’s susu killed that reads: “Kino kyekifo omukungu wa Palamenti Owekitiibwa Abiriga Weyakunkumula omusolo mu Seputemba 2017.” (This marks the spot where Hon Abiriga peed in September, 2017). 

Pictures: New Vision, Daily Monitor